Archive for October, 2014

The last cigarette.

January 20, 2014. One week before the spring semester started. One day after I got home from visiting my cousin Sam in Florida for a week. Go figure, the week I visited was the week after she and her boyfriend quit smoking. The funny thing was, I thought I’d quit the week after visiting, so being around them smoking wouldn’t make it more difficult for me! Anyway. I smoked a pack a day for 10 years. (more…)

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Underweight is mean you have a body mass index that is below 18.5. Many folks think being fat is a health risk, they might think being too skinny is good. But being overly skinny carries its own health risks,too.

About four years ago, I happened to have poor absorptions of nutrients. At that time, my weight was unintentionally dropping, and I was overly losing weight. I lost almost 20 pounds in just one month. In school, classmates and teachers started to give me dirty looks. Even when I go to the grocery stores with my mom, people ooked at me like I was from a differernt planet. I felt so bad. I did not try to lose any weight, and I was eating as much as I used to, since then I even tried to eat as much as I could everytime till I throw up. My family started to worry about me because I eat so much, but still did not gain any weights. They forced me to stop exercise and rest, at that time, they would just put me to bed after dinners. Finnally they took me to the doctor. The doctor said that I might suffered with an eating disorder. But after he arranged the blood test and all of those long examations for me, he told my family that I was diabetic, and I had to go on drugs to control it. Because diabetes affects the way my body uses the blood surgar, I would lose weight if my body do not get enough of suger to generate, even I might be eating as much as usual.

For most people, losing a few pounds without meaning to could be a good thing to them. But it’s important to know when unexpected weight loss is a serious cause for concern. And sometimes, unexpected weight loss can be a sign of a depressive illness, many cancer cause unintentional weight loss as well.

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In our society thin bodies are usually seen as the “best” bodies to have and the most “glamorous” even if getting these bodies results in health problems. This can especially be seen in the diet industry or in the fad diets which can be incredibly unhealthy. (more…)

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Does he like me for me or does he like me because I am fat? (more…)

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This video is one of my favorites. I believe that most people fall in love more than once in their lifetime. Some are just the “ideas” of what being in love really is… we yearn to feel accepted and crave that feeling of Love by different people.  (more…)

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Body Acceptance

“The image that concerns most people is the reflection they see in other people’s minds.”
Edward De Bono

How do we  really succeed full confidence in our bodies with society’s specific vision? This is a question I have recently been asking  myself. It is more recent because before I had never thought that I had a choice of the way my body should look. This is because growing up I had always been told what it is to be a lady and how my body should look in order to be accepted. I have always been super self conscience when it comes to my weight because in my household weight seemed to be a revisited topic. For me because I was always an “overweight” child. I usually got compared to my fit and muscular brother. He passionately played football so I was also expected to passionately play a sport. I was always strongly pushed to play a sport because of my thicker figure, with hopes I would loose weight or not gain any. I was constantly compared to my brother and what my parents and society told me was the ideal shape.

Having society’s ideal and “normal” weight always shown and told to me, it is the hardest thing to really except being different from that expectation. I have many days where I love and embrace my thick and curvier shape. Other days I constantly dwell on how I look  compared to those of the more ideal weight. Even when someone is thicker, there always is an appearance expectation. The fashion always is supposed to be kept up rather than the expectations from someone who is already at ideal shape. It is a struggle in which  I still look to accept how I feel about my body rather then persuaded by society’s perception. Is there really a full and complete way to accept our personal own body type? Even when we are up against what a body should be  and look like concerning doctors, health,and society. I always wonder will there be a body type acceptance for all.

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Throughout my twenty two years on this planet, weight and food has been a majority fixture and topic of social life. There are so many diet ads that promise the key to a happy and healthy life. They insinuate that when you lose weight, you will become a totally different person.

During my eighth grade year of middle school, I lost a lot of my baby fat and experienced just how true this insinuation was. I find it sad and shallow, that it’s true. The majority of societies really do treat you differently once you look different, in their opinion, “a good way”. As soon as I went through this transformation, everyone at my school suddenly wanted to be my friend. I do not exaggerate that over the duration of two days, half my school started adding me on xanga and tagged ( social media sites that were popular in 2005 , especially for young people). It seemed as if I had become a different person or something, because I was not only accepted into the “cool crowd”, but wanted! And I could never feel very comfortable with myself, because I could not forget the fact that  my personality had not changed, only my body. Each new “friendship” that was beginning always had a sense of fakeness; the pressure to be a certain way and act a certain way. Which just made it harder to find and create genuine connections.

I don’t feel that having a desirable body is the key to happiness, but I do believe society’s shallow behavior and actions do support and shore up the social and class roles regarding fat and beauty/happiness. Unfortunately I am quite aware that with the career path I have chosen, I will be forced to come across these ideas and views constantly. As an actor, you are required to be fit (not just for scenes, but also for the strenuous exercises and movement involved).

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