This past Friday I finally had a date with the guy I really liked for about six months, who also happens to live in Pennsylvania. I don’t fall for people very often..but when I do, I fall HARD. We’re talking send-a-care-package-in-the-mail-just-because-you-have-a-busy-semester kind of hard. And folks, it went horribly on Friday. I’ve been putting the list of things in my head that made this night turn into a similar scenario to the bombing of Pearl Harbor (maybe I’m a bit dramatic..but here it is):
a) I cared way too much about how he felt when I’d take a bite into my food, make a corny joke, or even walk in front of him.
b) I asked him on the date, but I didn’t exactly have anything planned. So he had to make all of the decisions…which didn’t please him.
c) I got stuck in traffic on the way there and didn’t even show up to his house until 7pm…two hours after he anticipated me to be there.
d) Since our relationship was mostly just texting each other, we had entirely different expectations of how each person would act.
So everyone, even though all of these disasters happened throughout the date, I somehow….SOMEHOW….really believed it was a good idea to try and kiss him. How do you think that went? You’re absolutely right, it was more awkward than a giraffe when it’s trying to drink water out of a lake (Google-image it). I left and haven’t talked to him since.
You know what though? I don’t regret any of it. Who’s to say that girl can’t make the first move? I was tired of wasting my time batting my eyes in front of him waiting for him to ask me out. Who has time for that?! I think people are still taken off guard when girls make the first move, because for the longest time girls weren’t supposed to. We were meant to be the dainty ones that paint our nails and learn how to sew while looking off into the distance awaiting our Prince Charming to appear at our window with a rose and the entire Lord of the Rings dvd collection.
Even in a society where women can educate, be CEOs, run for office, and be single parents…we’re still looked at as strange or desperate or even crazy when we make the first move. And why does it make us crazy or desperate to go after what we want? It’s not like I’m asking for much. In the words of Hannah Horvath from the show Girls, “I just want someone who wants to hang out all the time and thinks I’m the best person in the world and wants to have sex with only me.”